Here’s a super silly summary of an event at Metro Diner:
Twas a fortnight after Christmas when all throughout Metro, not a stomach was grumbling, not one single diner. The Southside restaurant’s event table was set with Yelp swag and great care. The servers stood ready to make sure the food would get there. We could see the line cooks ready to prepare with a flair. The manager made sure everyone was ready to present food extraordinaire. Twas a 6 course feast that we’d soon all be tasting, a “Comfort Food Coma” we were all awaiting. Matt said “Welcome,” “Hello”, then the manager said “Go!” and we were bombarded with platters to and fro. From table to table, the presentation began, it was Huevo Rancheros with fried jalapenos, cooked pan after pan. Like breakfast nachos we noshed at this not quite appetizer. We chatted and chewed and thanked the organizer. Next we splattered our forks in the Yo Hala on the Square banana and fruit feature and pretended it was dessert with each sweet little flavor. Then away with those plates – On to chicken and waffles! It was time for hot sauce and syrup, a combo that baffles. But delicious as ever and that crisp chicken we dipped in the strawberry butter and spicy sweetness. I knew that the feast must soon come to an end, there wasn’t much room left but my appetite would mend. “On Breakfast! On Dinner!” the courses continued and out came the plates dashing, like an endless menu. A bowl full of shrimp and grits was the next item in the mix. That bacon, giant shrimp, things continued like this. Soon we’d be chubby and plump, like happy yelp elfs, so we tasted and talked about just one more helping. Soon the next course arrived – promised to be next to last, so we pulled out our forks and the die was cast. With meatloaf, mashed taters, green beans and that gravy, each savored bite helping grow each little food baby. All stuffed and all puffed and served hot teas end to end, they brought out the last platter – my tight jeans I could mend. They grabbed us to-go boxes with a wink from our servers, it was time to dig into Holy Davoli burgers. With applause all around, and sighes of such satisfaction, we stumbled out of our chairs, a food coma reaction.